just a thought.

so, this whole labor and delivery thing has been a little rough on me. yes, it turned out fine, and i have a super fantastic little boy that i get to stare at and make faces with and who makes me almost unbearably happy. however... to get there i had to (quite unwillingly) cave in and do a bunch of things that i was really uncomfortable with. they were not easy decisions to make. i'm incredibly lucky that i had such a strong support system to help me through it.

however.

having a baby is emotional enough, even when things go exactly as planned. the last thing anyone needs is to hear things that make them feel like they've failed. over the last few days, i've had to hold myself back while being told:

"you really just don't have any other options. it would be a waste of energy to keep going"
"home births never really work out anyway"
"that's a really lousy decision, but i can see you've made up your mind"
"i just don't have time to take you [to feed him]"
"all the nurses joke- the longer the birth plan, the more likely you are to have complications"
"you probably won't get your placenta back"

sadly, i could keep going. but i'm not going to, because i also had 2 particularly amazing nurses that made me feel like i could do anything. and thank goodness for them, otherwise i most likely would have been a complete wreck (as opposed to the partial wreck i am right now).

today i got to bring the monkey home. it's taking everything in me to not kiss him raw.